Blog

The Gift of Limitations
It was a rambling college-town that hosted the race that was to be my last for a long time. It is a town where narrow dirt-and-dust roads lead to horse farms with near-perfect views of the Blue Ridge and millionaires shamelessly drive beat-up old Volvos. Eccentric....

God Wants Our Sad
This friend's eyes were some of the first to read the manuscript that I'd almost tucked under my mattress, hoping it would only be shared between me and God. As a timid response to the whisper from Him -- write your story -- I stayed up into the wee hours of the night...

I Share a Bloodline With The Children We Adopted
“Look, she’s calling you mommy!” said a beautifully well-intentioned friend, wanting to celebrate just how quickly we’d become a family. My little girl was building with legos in the corner and her less-than-nimble fingers needed help piecing them together. She called...

For When You Are Fresh Out of Amazing
I managed to crumple into a heap on my bed while holding the babe. I was still a mother, even in this melted state. I finally released the kind of tears you cry when a dozen times previous they’ve been stifled. These weren’t just today’s sobs. The questions I’d been...

The Myth of Human Strength
My best and brightest moments have been laced with weakness. We met our first two children in Ethiopia and spent our first days of parenting in a tempered state of shock over the rolling meltdowns. While adopting our second two children from Uganda, I saw...

The Antidote to Comparison
Three sisters share a bathroom, a closet, hairbrushes and the nightly bedtime recounting of the day. They know each other’s strengths just as surely as they know one another’s morning breath. All the girls know that Eden can sing and Hope can dance and Lily can paint....

The Mindless Looking {and what it steals from me}
"Why doesn't anyone else have to do this Mommy?" she asks again as we drive to another specialist appointment. No matter how I answer, she still has the same question. It's as if there are no answers for her, for this kind of question. Yet. With adoption, there are...

That Question: “What Am I Doing Wrong?”
I had to hear it through a half-dozen other mouths before I realized it’d been in my head first, and for possibly years. “What am I doing wrong?” It’s the mother whose child isn’t sleeping, and the wife who’s husband isn’t emoting, and the daughter who’s father is...

How Marriage is Teaching Me to Search the Whole Person
“How well do you think your husband knows you?” this new-to-me christian counselor asked me on a frigid January afternoon as I sat in her office. “Really well,” I responded without thinking. After a studied pause, she asked, “What percentage of ‘all of you’ does he...

I Will Not Defer
I was fourteen and still riding my bike to my best friend's when I exchanged the innocence of youth for unbelief. I was out of pigtails but still had a bedtime when I siphoned myself off hope. It would be at least 15 years later before I realized what had happened to...