Losing Sleep. Again.

Moving has kicked my tail. The last time I remember exerting this much physical energy, consistently, over more than a week, was when I spent a month working in the dining hall of a Young Life summer camp. I went to bed each night feeling like my body couldn’t possibly rise to the occasion one more day–only to wake up the next morning and do it all over again. For 30 days.

Add a few more weeks, two little ones, and the daunting task of coordinating a bumped-up closing, house renovations and a furlough at Nana’s in between, and I’ve been left wondering if I will ever, again, catch up on sleep.

Tonight will not be the night.

About two weeks ago, in the midst of my moving stupor, I promised Eden and Caleb that while we were at Nana’s they would get one night to sleep with Mommy. I am not the family-bed type–mostly because without seven full hours of sleep, I am less than the mother I already struggle to be on my best days. This was a special treat. I was dually gearing them up for one full week without Nate (while his boot-camp continued in Kansas City, meeting the movers and cleaning for his type-A wife who gets nightmares thinking about finding previous homeowner detritus in her new home) and reminding them that life with a mommy-distracted-by-packing was coming to an end soon. Sleeping with Mommy trumps every other special treat for one cuddle-bug, in particular.

They didn’t forget. And even though I haven’t yet shed my motherhood training wheels, I do know that unfulfilled promises do not go unnoticed by little eyes.

So, in a few moments I will head downstairs to our mini-apartment at Nana’s house, and pray to God that I can salvage some much-needed sleep in between little hands clamoring for a resting place around my neck or waist.

A friend and mentor, who is sending her first child off to college this weekend, said to me (through tears) something to the effect of: savor this time; it’s gone before you can blink.

I’ve heard that a hundred times at least since bringing the children home, but this time, it stuck. I’ve decided this semi-annual event will be one I choose to cherish (at least on the front end :)).

I may decide differently tomorrow morning.

 

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